The bestseller, The G-spot, was published in 1982 based on research done in the 1940s. And here we all are: still arguing about what the g-spot is, what the g-spot isn’t, whether the g-spot can make women ejaculate, if so, how—and does ejaculating really just mean you’ve accidentally wet yourself?
Well, things have firmed up in the last few years (ahem), and newer g-spot research is a lot clearer and more specific than ever before. Best of all, the stumbling block most of us (myself definitely included) battled with—that not all women had one—has been solved. Newer research suggests everyone does have this “hot spot,” but the amount of tissue and number of nerve endings varies from woman to woman. That explains why our reactions to it range from massively enthusiastic to decidedly lukewarm.
So where is said G-spot?
Most people know their urethra: It’s the tube you pee out of, right? Well, there’s spongy tissue wrapped around the urethra that’s erectile, meaning that it swells when blood fills it. The part of the “urethral sponge” you can feel through the top wall of the vagina is, ladies and gentleman, the G-spot (the definition most people now seem to agree on anyway).
It’s part of the same network of nerve endings that makes up the hidden part of the clitoris, and it’s also sometimes referred to as the female prostate (which makes sense, given that the male prostate is the male “G-spot”).
Why are the G-spot and female ejaculation linked?
The urethral sponge tissue also contains between 30 and 40 paraurethral glands and ducts (para just means “near”). These glands are thought to be responsible for the production of the fluid some females ejaculate. During ejaculation, this fluid flows from the glands through the ducts into the urethra before finally making its escape out of the body.
How do I find my G-spot?
It’s not difficult to find—just a bit awkward. Slide a finger inside your vagina, palm facing up, as if you’re trying to touch your tummy. Next, hook it around slightly forward. Aim about two to three inches inside and feel for slightly ridged tissue on the front wall; it almost feels like a softer version of the front of the roof of your mouth.
The G-spot responds best to a “come here” motion, where you pull your fingers over the area. Pay attention to what you’re feeling, as well as what you’re feeling for. It may feel more sensitive than other areas. Experiment with different strokes, and don’t be scared to use firm, hard pressure: It’s not as skittish as the touchy clitoris. The more aroused you are, the more the area will swell and the easier it will be to feel.
There’s a reason why women tend to stick to clitoral orgasms during masturbation. To give yourself a G-spot orgasm, you have to twist your arm into a weird position and it’s not exactly comfy. Which is why if you really want to give it a go, it’s a good idea to cheat. (Keep reading and I’ll tell you how!)
Cheat your way to a G-spot orgasm
The cheating way to enjoying a G-spot orgasm comes via specially designed vibrators. If your vibe has a ball at each end, you’re supposed to hold onto one ball while using the other ball to massage yourself. G-spot vibrators are usually sold with explicit instructions, but the curved tip of the vibrator will point towards your top wall. Don’t move it in and out of your vagina like you might a normal vibe. Instead, make a rocking motion so it starts to feel like a firm massage. If you like the sensation, try using your G-spot vibrator (or getting him to use it) during oral sex. Another trick: Ask him to press down lightly on your lower abdomen while the G-vibrator (or his fingers or penis) is in your vagina. This will provide extra pressure on the “back side” of your G spot.
Why does it feel like I’m about to pee rather than orgasm?
When the sponge tissue swells, it presses against the urethra and bladder. A full bladder tends to feel the same. You need to get past this feeling to orgasm so, if you’re worried that your bladder really is full, stop and go to the loo, then go back to what you were doing. If the same sensation builds again, it’s a pretty good bet you’re on the verge of a G-spot orgasm, if not ejaculation.
How can I be sure the “ejaculate” isn’t really just pee?
Both ejaculate and urine come out of the same tube, so ejaculate is bound to include traces of urine. Also remember, the jury’s still out on whether females ejaculate at all, so there’s not exactly a huge amount of research done on stuff like this. Women I’ve spoken to say the fluid they ejaculate isn’t yellow and sometimes looks a bit milky. What little analysis that has been done shows that it’s made up of prostate-specific antigen (which is also present in semen).
Are G-spot orgasms different than clitoral orgasms?
G-spot orgasms come from the same nerve endings as clitoral orgasms, but the feeling does appear to differ woman to woman. Clitoral orgasms, on the other hand, feel more universal among women. But we’re jumping the gun a little here: Just because you’ve found your G-spot doesn’t mean you’ll definitely have a G-spot orgasm. Some women simply don’t find it to be that sensitive. Some women even find the sensation incredibly irritating because it’s too intense. “It just feels like I’ll die if I don’t pee [at that moment], and I don’t find that sexy at all,” was the response of one girl who tried it. Most studies claim about two-third
Will a G-spot orgasm make me ejaculate?
It might! All women have the “sponge,” but not all women ejaculate. You’re more likely to ejaculate, though, if:
You’re incredibly aroused
Your G-spot is stimulated
You have strong pelvic floor muscles (i.e. you’ve been doing your Kegel exercises)
Some women ejaculate a few measly little drops; others a cup or more. Most of the time, women orgasm and ejaculate simultaneously, but that’s not always the case.
What’s the difference between simply “getting wet” and ejaculating?
Normal lubrication happens more gradually and more evenly. If you ejaculate, it tends to happen fast and usually around the time of orgasm. There’s a mixed response to whether you can “teach yourself” to orgasm. In my opinion, if you want to try, go for it. Do your Kegels, invest in a G-spot vibrator, explore your body and, if you feel the urge to pee, try pushing it out rather than holding it in. Devotees say it also helps if you remove the toy (or finger or his penis) because that might stop the fluid from gushing out. Of course, if you stop everything a little too hastily, the orgasm might disappear along with the hoped-for ejaculation, so timing’s crucial on that one! Like everything else sexual, G-spot orgasms are healthy to aim for, not so healthy to obsess about. And there’s no evidence that ejaculation makes for a better orgasm anyway!
Culled from: http://articles.ivillage.com/2008-07-24/Parenting/21648451_1_g-spot-female-prostate-hot-spot